Dec 102012

January 2012 afforded the opportunity to do a show in Oakland, CA at the rapidly expanding Vitus. Over six months the affair took many twists and turns, ultimately turning the dead prelude to evening music into a vibrant and lauded comedy night featuring locals, visitors and bone fide stars. Then, with one quick swipe, Vitus’ partners ended their relationship and the club was closed permanently. The Vitus Show, so young, died too soon.

Then, in an unforeseen opening, the producers of the Vitus experience were called to produce a show at the historic Dirty Trix Saloon, dubbed Courting Comedy: The Show.

That night’s success allowed for another night captured with great affect by Andrew Moore.

Then, on the endorphins of an unbeatable spirit, old pals reached out to restart what once began in Jack London Square.

Started on November 29th, 2012, the Storking Comedy show has begun the arduous task of reestablishing a fresh new comedy show in Oakland, California. Taking residence in the infamous Stork Club, the show is a proper caper, barely escaping with toothy grin and a fist full of dollars. OJ Patterson provides structure and vision to the open-mic/showcase while offering an additional platform for the show’s greatest attraction: the interview.

As heard on the recently launched Sylvan Productions SoundCloud, each comedian is prodded and poked about their powerful jokes (or the audience’s lackluster response). Check out the Stork Club’s official recording of the first night: here. And you are welcome, as always, to spend some time at Sylvan Production’s latest East Bay haunt, the Stork Club. Every Thursday, 6:30-9PM. Open Mic Sign-Ups, 6:00PM. New Line-Ups Every Week. Always Absolutely For Free.

This week’s show: Hand to Mouth (with Trevor Hill and James Fluty)

 Posted by at 9:25 pm
Nov 162012

It’s a rainy day in the city by the Bay. And all of the comedians are are out to play.

Well. Not really. They’re waiting for the sun to go down. Like snipe hunting, you gotta wait for the sun to go down for the hahas to come out.

Time to get some of the work out of the way. I wrote about tonight’s show Fresh Like Cadaver and tomorrow’s Get Yucked Up in the last post en masse. Nonetheless, it serves a purpose to repeat myself. GO! GO SEE EM! RUSH THE STAGE!

Remember how Gborie was in the Seattle International Comedy Competition?! Well somebody filmed a bunch of comedy from the competition and posted it on youtube.

AND our newsletter recently went out, if you haven’t subscribed yet then you’re missing out on some of the sweet musings of OJ Patterson.

We’re going to head out to Pamtastic’s Comedy Show on Mutiny Radio on the way to Fresh Like Cadaver. If you’re hanging out at home you can listen in LIVE at 8:00 pm.

 Posted by at 5:26 pm
Nov 142012

“Let’s just fuckin write – wait – no – this has gotta be… somewhat coherent.” – @LLDABEAST

That’s how we’re doing it tonight at Sylvan House, ladies and gentlemen. We all just trotted down to the Balboa Theater for a showing of Wreck It Ralph. It was a heart warming Toy Story where in an kid’s room old arcade toys vidya games characters come to life become sentient programs. A classic hero story in a memorable universe, with hilarious and insightful call-backs to popular video game franchises and tropes. Not only was the movie hilarious, but David Gborie and Keith D’Souza (fresh from the road and running on very little sleep) fell asleep towards the end of the movie. As the film ended, the protagonist uttered his final inspirational line… And then, with comic timing so precise he couldn’t have planned it better, Gborie let out a snore that shook the heavens. Many a lawls were had, and we staggered out of the theater like a pack of old-school chums.

Tonight is the Sylvan Open Mic at Dirty Trix. Sign ups are in a mere hour, dear readers. So get on your Vespa and get down to Dirty Trix NOW!

What are you doing Friday night, audience people?!

Cause you should be going to Fresh Like Cadaver.

FRESH LIKE CADAVER! is a horror themed, LIVE movie riffing comedy show in the spirit of Mystery Science Theater 3000 held at The Cinecave “Micro-Theater” located in the basement of Lost Weekend Video in The Mission District of San Francisco. It’s the brain child of Andre Parker. And Andre Parker is pretty damn funny. So get yourselves there and into some seats ASAP! I don’t care if it’s a few days till Friday, GET DOWN THERE!

Fresh Like Cadaver commercial #1 by Andre Parker on GoAnimate

Animation Software – Powered by GoAnimate.

Anyway, I’m gonna get down to Trix, I’ll see you all there.

Buenos Noches, dear readers.


Nov 122012

We don’t have much in the way of promotions for you today, silly readers. Mr Sylvan webmaster has spent all of my non-day job hours today establishing the brand new

If you haven’t checked out Blackstronauts yet then you are depriving yourself of some SERIOUS entertainment. We’ve collected all of the released episodes together on the new site to make it look as impressive as it sounds. So do yourself a favor, and get over to and listen to some podcastin’ already!

Keith D’Souza and Andrew Holmgren are still on the road…

“Keith and I got lost in the woods, got picked up, cuddled with dogs in giant bean bag chairs, and now someone is taking us snowboarding!”

The location tag in this photo says “Government Camp, OR“. We can only assume they’ve been arrested by the Federal Government and they’re being interrogated by some new tyrannical form of torture known as frozen-waterboarding.


We wish the two stalwart companions good luck, and god speed in their journey.

Tomorrow night is Open Improv at Dirty Trix Saloon. Andrew Moore will be performing at Eric Barry’s Milk Bar Show, so Justin will be hosting all by his lonesome.

That means everyone gets to stay up late, watch south park, and eat ice cream for dinner CAUSE I’M A BOSS BABY SITTER,

Get down to Dirty Trix around 8 and laugh your brains out!


 Posted by at 7:43 pm
Nov 102012

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s Saturday night. Yeah, that’s the video that popped up when I searched “It’s Saturday Night”. Maybe I laughed A LOT harder than you did when you watched it, but now I’m really pumped to write the rest of this post.

Wow. Go Tigers!

Anyway, dear readers, let’s get busy.

Next Saturday is another installment of the infamous showcase named Get Yucked Up. Brought to you by David Gborie (@thegissilent) and Andrew Holmgren (@andrew_holmgren) this show is hands down our most popular show. If you want a seat, show up to Dirty Trix early, say around 8. This show is always packed out the door, and it’s one of the funnier things you can find in the city on a Saturday night.

You may know  Sylvan member and hilarious comedian Clare O’Kane, but do you know internetclare? O’Kane’s tumblr is a hub of creative outlet for the aspiring comedienne, featuring many a funny joke and other impressive artistic endeavors. Go check it out!



I’m still pretty pumped about the tigers. I think I’m going to go read about them on wikipedia now.



OH HEY BTW P.S. SUPER SECRET NOT REALLY: Rumor is will be launching in the next few days. Stay tuned for more!

 Posted by at 9:03 pm
Nov 092012

Well. There’s a lot to write about. First and foremost, Andrew Moore (@amofoshoyo) and myself (Justin Gomes [@waytogomes]) just finished performing at the International Hostel for an international crowd. Needless to say, they appreciated our universal language of laughter. Or at least they understood the word “beer”. Nonetheless, many a hahas were had, and we’ll be performing there regularly on Fridays. But, don’t get your hopes up about attending, it’s for guests on the hostel only, so if you want to check out the show you better book a room.

Meanwhile, Keith D’Souza (@Keith_D_Comedy) has joined Andrew Holmgren (@Andrew_Holmgren) in the Land of Bridges. They are currently bestowing the community of Portland, OR with our own signature Sylvan style of comedy. God speed to them and may their audiences be fruitful with laughter!

David Gborie (@thegissilent) is still in Seattle for the Seattle International Comedy Competition. Rumor is he touched a wall made completely out of gum. We’ll need to get some evidence to verify it, preferably A.B.C.

Sylvanites Misha Trubs and Andrew Moore are currently in rehearsal for the Dark Room Theater production of Merry Christmas Charlie Brown. Be sure to check it out when it opens on December 1st!

Last, but most certainly not least…


It’s out best podcast. And it’s a hilarious insightful journey into the minds of the best comedians in San Francsico. This latest episode features Sylvan member Matt Louv (@MattLouv). OJ Patterson (@OJPATTERSON) and David Gborie go out on the prowl for ladies, imbibe intoxicating beverages, and dance the night away for this episode, appropriately titled

“In Da Club”

Thank you, and goodnight.


 Posted by at 11:23 pm
Nov 082012

Two Sylvanites have traveled far from their homes, dear readers.

Andrew Holmgren (@andrew_holmgren) and David Gborie (@thegissilent) are currently making funny things in Seattle. Well, they were. We can only assume as much as communication with the duo has been difficult. Rumor has it after rendering an entire syncopal with a dual headlining set they had to go off the grid. While comedy on the lam is difficult, it isn’t impossible. If they’ve managed to maintain their itinerary, Gborie should be performing in the Seattle International Comedy Competition, and Holmgren should be somewhere around Portland, OR.


Tonight Kollin Holtz (@KollinHoltz) will be making some funny hahas at his signature Laughing Stock comedy show at Bar 4N5. The Headliner will be the hilarious Hector Rodriguez. John Hoogasian, Kollin Holtz, and Charlie Ballard will make up the meat of the show, while Anthony Sandoval will be handling the hosting duties. Head down to Bar 4N5 quickly! It’s only $5!

We’ve got even MORE fun writings and news coming your way tomorrow! And yeah. I missed the posting last night. I totally dropped that ball. You see, we were cleaning Sylvan House, and then afterwords we all fell into a pizza/rum induced coma. It was maddening, but we’re prepping the house for… drum roll… A HOUSE SHOW! BOOM!


It’s one of the only regular pieces of internet media we’re dropping, so do yourself a favor and listen in on OJ and Gborie’s podcast: Blackstronauts!


Talk to yall later. Buenos noches, amigos.




 Posted by at 5:10 pm
Nov 052012

No matter how many times it the universe tries to kill Open Improv, it keeps coming back.

If you’ve read the bio on this site, you know that Open Improv was started a few years ago in Justin and Andrew’s backyard. But did you know that their roommate David-John Schamber became Sylvan’s first and only Audio Visual Engineer through the Open Improv? Keeping true to the spirit of improvisation, the guys would use literally every tool at their disposal in order to make the show more chaotically entertaining. DJ became the show’s DJ, and the show began using audio and video cues. By using youtube videos, random family photo albums from flickr, and epic instrumentals, a new spark was added to an already hilarious experience.

We kinda-sorta lost that magic when we moved the show from the Dark Room Theater to Sub/Mission. Don’t get me wrong, we love Sub/Mission, and we love doing comedy at a venue that’s just as way more punk than we are. But the intimacy of the space was lost, in the cavernous Sub/Mission main room DJ was thrust to the back of the room, and we didn’t have access to all the audio and video equipment we had before. Consequently, a bit of the magic was lost and the show never really set well in the space.

Fortunately, we’ve made a bit of an impression on the wonderful and beautiful proprietors of Dirty Trix Saloon, and they’ve agreed to let us move Open Improv to Dirty Trix. We couldn’t be more excited.

A. We love Dirty Trix.
B. It’s a smaller, more intimate space.
C. They have access to video and audio that we’ve been missing/craving.
D. We love Dirty Trix.
E. We’re bring DJ back up to the front of the show.

So tomorrow night, come down and watch/make some funny stuff with us at Dirty Trix. While you’re there, imbibe some sweet, sweet, booze poured by Sylvan’s favorite bartender, Damon. And the election results will be coming in, so let’s figure out which party is going to take the Senate together!

 Posted by at 6:28 pm
Nov 032012

It’s one of those every other Saturdays where we throw it down at the Sylvan comedy HQ, our lady Dirty Trix. Sylvan mastermind OJ Patterson and his signature show once again graces our westerly shores before it’s anticipated return to Oakland at the end of the month. It’s a unique hybrid blend of a show featuring OJ’s favorite comedians, and then immediately, post-performance, he subjects them to an interview process that can be described as an eldritch pairing of the investigatory journalism of 60 Minutes and the tomfoolery of a pedantic discourse with Stephen Colbert. We invite you to join us in our in merriment and hilarity as we showcase some of the Bay’s veteran stand up comedians. Come laugh with us as Joe Tobin slangs some punchlines, get real with Chris Burns as she preforms an ostectomy on your funny bone, feel the generous love of Jesse McGrath‘s mouth-talkings, and find out what ladies REALLY want (to laugh about) with Nicole Calasich.

Oh Justin! You forgot to mention the special guests! DID I?! OR DID I MAKE A WHOLE SEPARATE PARAGRAPH JUST FOR THEM!?

Special Guests Alison Stevenson and Charlie Ballard are guaranteed to delight the crowd. Alison is adored by Sylvan, and her jokes are bar none. She has a hilarious twitter account,she’s performed in Denver’s Too Much Funstival and the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, AND she’s  the current standing champion of the infamous Tourettes Without Regrets dirty haiku challenge. Which means she’s got more golden phallus trophies than ANYONE READING THIS PAGE!

 Speaking of golden phalluses, phallusi, phalli. Charlie ballard is hella gay. In fact, he’s the #1 gay native american comedian in the country. He also runs the acclaimed and appropriately named Hella Gay comedy show in the Bay Area. He’s a long time vet of the local scene, and his credits (which are far to long to list) include America’s Got Talent, the San Francisco International Comedy Competition, and TMZ.

So come on down to Dirty Trix tonight and laugh your brains off!

 Posted by at 11:50 am
Apr 292012

Hello, gracious reader,

We here at Sylvan Productions are fastly approaching a spectacular night of comedy revelry, this Thursday, at Vitus in Oakland. 

5/3. Kyle Kinane @ Vitus. 201 Broadway. Oakland. $15. 8PM. Featuring Keith D’Souza, Jesse McGrath and hosted by Amy Miller. Tickets Available: Here.

Kyle Kinane has become one of America’s rising comic stars, and he does it his way. Hailing from Illinois, Kinane has risen to the top of Comedy’s pantheon by being involved in almost every prestigious festival known to man, appeared on shows like ConanComedy Central Presents and Denver Native TJ Miller’s Mash Up on Comedy Central. His debut album “Death of The Party” from AST Records is an acclaim magnet and his appearances on podcasts like Who Charted? and Doug Loves Movies (among others) have made him part of the fabric of today’s comedy scene. Kyle is on a non-stop tour spanning locations across the country and the globe as he can’t seem to stop booking great gigs.
Also on the bill are

Keith D’Souza 

and Jesse McGrath,
two comedians that sure know how to party. Rambunctiousness aside, they are also two of the premier young talents in the San Francisco Bay Area.
The night is hosted by Amy Miller, Vitus major domo and savvy humorista. A charming, sassy, urbane stand-up comedian, Miller has performed with Hannibal Buress, Rory Scovel, Moshe Kasher, and at venues such as the Rickshaw Stop and the San Francisco Punch Line.

And if all that goodness isn’t enough to wet your palette

Here is Kyle as “King Pizza”. We’ll see you on Thursday.

 Posted by at 6:47 pm

Nice job!
You now have 30 lives.
Now you can totally die, like, a bunch of times.

Konami Easter Egg by